


From Tragedy comes Happiness

by Do_not_careissa



Series: JayKyle Week 2020 [3]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, Green Lantern (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Accidental Baby Acquisition, Anxiety, Cute Lian Harper, Discord: JayKyle Week 2020, Good Dad Jason Todd, Is Kyle's kryptonite, Jason in a Suit, JayKyle Week (DCU), Lost Love, M/M, Marriage, One-Sided Roy Harper/Jason Todd, Parenthood, Strained Relationships, blame canon, implied BatLantern, roy harper is dead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:14:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26811226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Do_not_careissa/pseuds/Do_not_careissa
Summary: Roy was dead. Roy, his best friend, the man who understood him, who stood by him through thick and thin, was gone, never to be seen again. Jason didn't know what to do, what he even could do. But after having a baby shoved into his arms, one with eyes identical to Roy's, he had to make a decision. He might have lost Roy, but he wouldn't lose his daughter.
Relationships: Dick Grayson & Jason Todd, Dinah Lance & Jason Todd, Jason Todd & Donna Troy, Koriand'r & Jason Todd, Kyle Rayner & Lian Harper, Kyle Rayner/Jason Todd, Lian Harper & Jason Todd
Series: JayKyle Week 2020 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1953484
Comments: 12
Kudos: 247





	From Tragedy comes Happiness

**Author's Note:**

> For day three of JayKyle Week 2020, accidental baby acquisition.

The apartment had been empty when he left the day before, the curtains drawn and the windows all locked up and bolted. Even being on the seventeenth floor, one could never be too safe after all. When he opened the door he found the door to still be locked, the lights still off.

He pulled his gun anyway.

And there, on the other end of the barrel, was a woman that most certainly did not belong there.

“Talk,” Jason snapped, and that’s when things went from bad to worse.

Sniffling could be heard from behind the woman, soon followed by crying and then wailing. She turned around, not even caring about the pistol still pointed at her as she reached for the crying child. She bounced the child a few times, the wailing soon subsiding, all while acting like Jason wasn’t even there. Once the baby had calmed she turned back to him. “Where is Roy Harper?”

His grip tightened on the gun, his eyes narrowing. Red hair, grease streaked skin, and a lazy smile danced across his vision, all while his heart squeezed for all it was worth. It was too recent, all of it, but he supposed it might always feel that way.

“He’s currently unavailable,” Jason droned, “would you like to leave a message?”

The woman huffed, her eyes darting to the windows and back. “I do not have time for your games. I must know where he is,  _ now _ .”

Jason studied her, watched her minute twitches, how she seemed torn between holding the baby close and pushing it away, the look in her eyes. It wasn’t panic or fear, but it was close. 

“Dead,” he forced himself to say the word, to let it be heard as it ripped through his throat. His best friend, one of the few people to ever care about him, was dead, murdered, and unlike Jason himself he knew Roy wouldn’t be waking back up.

The woman stared back at him in disbelief. “No, that is not possible.” She marched closer, the baby held tight as she swatted the gun from her face. “Quit with your foolish games, there is no time!”

“It’s not a game,” he snarled. Who the hell did this woman think she was? To come here and make demands, to act like he could ever in a million years lie about Roy’s life? Who the hell did she think she was?

Well, whoever she was she took a step back, staring out the window. Whatever she saw it couldn’t be good. In the next instance Jason had an armful of bundled up baby, his gun sent clattering to the floor.

“The hell—"

“I must leave,” she interrupted, racing towards his balcony.

“And what about—”

“Lian, her name is Lian. You must protect her. If Roy is no longer alive then I have no choice but to entrust our daughter to you.”

“Wait, hang on, what—”

“If I do not leave now I cannot say what could happen. Please,” she stopped and looked back at him, her eyes begging him to understand. “Take care of her, if not because I ask, then for Roy.”

He tried yelling out to her again, but by then she was gone, allowing the late Gotham night air to flow into his little apartment. He looked out, past the curtains and over the railing, but there was no sign of her, or whatever she had been watching for.

He slipped back inside, careful to reset the alarms on the door and balcony, and recheck all the windows. Once done he looked down, finding a pair of curious green eyes staring right back up at him. That green, he could remember that green, once surrounded by smudges of oil, other times by a red domino mask. Jason had loved the color, had gotten such happiness whenever he saw it, with its light and joy and life.

The baby, Lian, patted his arm and made a noise. She reached for his face, her small fingers grasping the air. He held out his hand, letting her grab one of his fingers. God she was so small.

Her laughter pulled him from the thought as she sent him a big, toothless smile. He knew the smile he gave in return was awkward and no doubt subpar, but she waved her arms and giggled anyway. Talk about a confidence booster.

“So, uh, Lian,” he said as he moved back to where he’d been standing earlier, taking the time to pick up his pistol and set it somewhere high. He found a bag where the woman had stood, and he couldn’t be happier to find a few days worth of supplies there. “Guess you’re stuck with me now, huh?”

Thinking about it, he couldn’t just give her up. He refused to put a child into the system if he had any other option. He’d seen what it looked like, had learned enough even as a child to run from it. Lian might have a better chance at finding a good family since she was so young -babies were always in high demand after all- but he didn’t trust any stranger enough to do that to a child, let alone Roy’s. He could see if any of the capes, anyone who knew Roy, was interested. But no, he couldn’t bear the thought of that either. Looking at her head, he found short black strands peeking out around the blanket. He chuckled to himself. Yeah, that wasn’t an option, not if his goal was to keep her safe. And that meant away from Bruce and his army of black haired and blue eyed children.

Lian giggled with him, clapping as he smiled down at her. This was fine, he could handle it. Really, with all the monsters he’s faced, what’s the worst a baby could do?

* * *

A lot, that’s what.

Arguably those first few weeks were the worst. Before Lian had come around his biggest concern had been keeping Bruce and the other Bats and Leaguers off his back, to stay safe while staying true to himself and his morals. Now he was juggling all of that with raising a baby, something he’d honestly never thought he’d be given the chance to do.

It wasn’t that he disliked kids or that he’d drawn a hard line about having any. It wasn’t that he was opposed to the idea, hell he’d found a strange sort of joy whenever he managed to put a smile on some poor, forgotten child’s face. Those were some of the moments when he felt like he was making the biggest impact in this hell scape of a city. He loved those kids, even if every other mother fucker in Gotham wouldn’t.

But at some point he’d accepted that having one of his own just wouldn’t happen. Between his work and the dangers in being connected to the Red Hood, the chance that one night he might not make it home, the guilt such an idea instilled in him, all of that served as enough of a reason to accept that it would never happen. He couldn’t put a child through that, it wasn’t fair to them.

Worst of all though, there was the fear. The fear of fucking up, of taking an innocent life and ruining it, sending them down a path not too different from the one he’d wound up on. The fear of failure, of becoming everything he hated.

The fear of being like Willis.

That was always what ended that particular train of thought, the one thing that left him up at night, staring at the ceiling, trying desperately to convince himself that he wasn’t like that man. Willis might be his father by blood and paper, but he’d never be his dad. He sure as hell hadn’t been for the last few years they’d been together.

The thoughts would always wander to Bruce then, to days when Jason had magic and when Bruce would smile, when they’d share their happiness instead of their fists, when Jason could ask for help without worry of being ignored or locked away. He missed that Bruce so much, especially now. But he couldn’t trust Bruce, not with himself, and certainly not with his daughter.

No, Bruce would take her away, call him unfit, accuse him of kidnapping her, of putting her in harms way. He couldn’t do that.

So he struggled in silence.

In the two months since her arrival he had only touched his Red Hood gear maybe three times, and that always coincided with an emergency. And each time he did it he felt more guilty than the last. The next door neighbor didn’t mind watching Lian, the struggling college student more than willing to clear her night and morning for the money he was willing to pay. So leaving Lian with someone wasn’t the issue, it was just… leaving her.

Two months, she’d only been with him for two months and he could hardly bring himself to leave. She wasn’t attached to his hip, if anything he was attached to hers. And every time she looked at him with those eyes, he’d fall a little more in love.

The parents in the class he took always mentioned it, called them precious and sweet and all those words that shouldn’t apply to him. And maybe once they didn’t, but he wasn’t going to complain, especially not when Lian would giggle at the names and repeat back “pwesus”.

He didn’t know when she was supposed to start talking, but the teachers said she was doing well for her age if she was already attempting to copy what others said. He wasn’t too worried.

When she tried to stand for the first time he almost cried. Then she patted his cheek and shook her head and he could only pull her into a hug. God, what a sap he’d become. 

Of course it was only a matter of time before someone found out about his little secret. He’d been missing from the caped scene for months after all. At some point someone would come looking for him.

He was just grateful it had been Kori.

She took one look at Lian and understood immediately. “Roy?” she’d asked quietly as she crouched down. Lian stared at her for a moment, clearly confused by the stranger in her living room, before looking up to Jason.

He nodded as he crouched down beside Kori, smiling as he beckoned her over. “Yeah,” he whispered.

The two watched as Lian hobbled the few feet over to them, her little hands gripping the coffee table as she went. She relished in their cheers and encouragement, a look of determination etched on that adorable face. She reached them with a cry of “dudah!” and Jason couldn’t resist the urge to scoop her up and spin around. Lian’s giggles and his laughter filled the air, and soon Kori’s melodic voice joined them. When they came to a stop Lian was still smiling, and she managed to weasel herself high enough to try and loop her arms around his neck in a hug. 

He squeezed her back and looked over to find Kori taking a picture. He couldn’t bring himself to care, not really. Kori was smart, she wouldn’t show it to just anyone. Kori wouldn’t risk putting him in danger.

“What is her name?” she asked as she brushed Lian’s hair back from her forehead.

“Lian,” he answered. Lian turned to him, recognizing her name even if she didn’t understand what they were saying.

“How old is she? I can never tell with Earth children.”

“Little under a year, at least that’s what she is according to the birth certificate.”

“So you have—” Kori cut herself off, looking to the side. “Roy is her father,” she said slowly, her eyes trained on an old picture hanging on the wall. It was from their little island, when it was just the three of them, when they were happy and together and alive. “Then who is her mother? Where is she?”

He shrugged, setting Lian down next to her toys so he could pull the lock box from under the couch. “Not too sure. She showed up, asked where Roy was, then took off. Birth certificate says her name’s Jade Nguyen, but I don’t know if that’s correct or not.”

Kori took the document, scanning the page. “Cheshire.”

“What?”

“Cheshire, that was Jade’s alias.”

“That lady that always flirted with Roy when they fought?”

“Yes.”

Jason whistled, long and low. “Okay. Any idea where she is then? ‘Cause I don’t.”

Kori sighed, sitting down on the old ratty sofa. “Believed to be dead.”

He nodded, his eyes returning to Lian. Really, would it matter either way? She’d left her daughter, had given her to Jason. Even if she came back she wouldn’t get Lian, not without a fight. He didn’t care if it was her blood in Lian’s veins or not. Lian was his daughter now, and no one was going to take her away.

“Who else knows about Lian?” Kori asked as she looked through the pictures that had been left by Jade.

“Just you. There’s the neighbor girl, Sara, she helps sometimes, and the others in the parenting class I’m in, but that’s it.”

She laughed. “That is just like you.”

“What is?”

“To go to school just to be a better parent.”

He huffed crossing his arms as he looked out the window. “It’s not like I had the best examples for what a dad should be,” he muttered.

“I know.” She patted his arm, and waited for him to look at her before she continued. “I just mean to say, you always do so much in the hopes of doing good. You might not be naturally gifted, or come from the best background, but you always put in the effort to be better. I can not say that about others.”

He nodded and looked away, unable to meet her eyes. “Thank you.”

“Lian is lucky to have you as her father.”

He ducked his head, fully aware that his ears were turning a bright read. Kori always had to say the cheesiest stuff, didn’t she?

* * *

Lian’s first birthday was a small, quiet affair, not that he’d expected anything else. It had just been the three of them, Jason, Lian, and Kori, and really that was all they needed. Sara managed to come by for a little while so she could give Lian her present and get Jason’s help on one of her papers. It had surprised him the first time she asked for his help, but by the fourth time he was ready for it. And with that of course came the questions about his own schooling, which came with it an unexplainable feeling of shame.

It wasn’t his fault that he never finished high school or went to college. And it wasn’t like he didn’t want to, but, well, dead kids didn’t get to go to school. He couldn’t tell her that of course, so he made up a story about some injury and a coma, that he’d been in the hospital and out of school for far too long to just go back. And now, well Lian came first. He didn’t feel right jumping into school with all its commitments and long hours and stress when she was at such a young age. She needed him more than he needed a degree. And Gotham University would still be there in a few years. He could wait. 

Sara accepted the answer, relaying her own struggles as she worked towards her degree, and he managed to convince himself this was the best choice. Really, all the money that would go towards his education, what good would it really do him? It’s not like he could really do much legal work with it, not like he needed credentials for anything. No, that money was better off being saved for Lian’s future, whatever that might be.

But while Sara left the conversation at that Kori certainly didn’t. It was about a month after the first conversation that they’d finally had a fight over it. Kori claimed he was making excuses and letting himself be held back, that he was better than that. Lian was asleep when it happened, and she seemed to have inherited her father’s sleeping habits at the very least seeing as she was still asleep by the time their fight was over and Kori was gone.

The carpeted floor called his name, and he let himself slide down the door frame, watching as Lian’s small form rose and fell with every breath. Frustration bubbled up through his chest, at Kori, at himself, at the world that would do this to him, at the world that would take a little girl’s daddy away before she’d even met him, at the people who would rather he’d stayed six feet under.

He knew it wasn’t a good idea to sleep like that, half propped against the wall, a head ache pounding through his skull, tears of anger and frustration and self loathing running down his face, but he couldn’t bring himself to move. His limbs felt like lead, and his head flopped down moments later as sleep washed over him. 

He spent the next few days in a state of fear. What if Kori never came back? Did he just fuck up one of, if not the only, friendship he still had? With Bizarro and Artemis gone he had no one else to turn to, no one he could really trust to know everything. Kori was the only one right now, and it felt like he’d fucked it all up. And for what? His own pity party? For all the confidence he projected, how tall he stood, he never felt quite good enough. Was that it?

He put a smile on for Lian, took her to all her favorite places, read to her every night, but he couldn’t stop the feeling that he was a fraud. It should be Roy here, not him. What right did he have raising a child?

But then Kori came back, apologies on her lips, and there was no way he could be expected to describe the relief that overcame him. She’d come back, he wasn’t alone. He hadn’t fucked up as much as he thought he had.

And then she mentioned letting others know, letting someone else in, and all his earlier fears came rushing back. If anyone knew they’d take Lian away, they’d lock him up, throw away the key, and he’d never see her again. Kori just listened, that look of heartbreak on her face as he laid out his fears.

She took his hand, held it close, and asked, “Do you trust me?”

He’d be an idiot to ever say no.

And within another month there was one more person added to Lian’s little circle of acquaintances. She took to Donna like they were long lost friends, or at least as close as a fifteen month old could. Jason had been worried when he opened the door to find Donna standing beside Kori, they hadn’t exactly talked much since his return, and the little they did wasn’t really that great. But then Lian saddled right up next to him, grabbing his leg for support, and said, “Hewwo.” Donna looked between the two of them, eyes wide and Jason knew he didn’t have to worry.

Somehow her one visit turned into two, and from there it became three, and suddenly she was visiting at least once every other week, if not more. It was weird to say the least, but he wasn’t going to turn down her help, and he certainly wasn’t going to turn away her extension of friendship.

And then she was followed by one Dick Grayson, and things got even weirder. It was inevitable, bound to happen one way or another, but he just, he just wished it hadn’t.

He’d been returning from the store, groceries in hand and fully expecting to walk into his apartment without delay to find Donna playing with Lian. Instead he found Dick waiting for him by the apartment lobby’s front door, a look of confusion, almost betrayal, painted on his face. Jason gripped his bags tighter, different escape options running through his head.

They were in public in the middle of the day, Dick wouldn’t attack him, surely not. But what if he did? That look in his eyes, the way he held his lips tight, Jason had a reason to be worried. It was always a possibility he’d ingested one of Crane’s or the Joker’s gases. It was also possible Dick was just there to find out what he was up to, why he’d been missing for almost a year now. It could be an errand from Bruce, track him down, find out what obviously nefarious plan he was up to, confront him, bring him in. They knew his hands were tied with civilians around, knew he would do his damned best not to fight or cause a scene if he could help it. They  _ knew _ .

Only Dick did none of that. He walked up, searched Jason’s eyes for  _ something _ , then took some of his bags. “Let’s get these upstairs,” Dick said as he turned around, heading towards the elevator with a confidence Jason currently lacked. 

“Dick, what are you doing?” he asked as he followed.

The button to his floor was already lit up, and Dick waited until the doors shut before turning around. “Why didn’t you tell us?” he asked with the most heartbroken voice. “Jason, we, god, just  _ why _ ?”

Alarm bells rang in his head, screaming at him that he was walking into an ambush, that he would walk off this elevator and be met by Bruce and all the other Bats, all just waiting to take him down. His heartbeat pounded in his ears, the bags growing slippery in his palms. It had been nearly a year, he hadn’t done anything, what the hell could they want with him?

Dick’s voice calling his name pulled him out of the almost panic attack, but it wasn’t enough to keep the terror from his eyes when he looked back.

“Why are you here?” he demanded desperately as the elevator trudged along.

“To find you,” Dick answered with concern. “No one’s seen you in  _ months _ , we got worried. So we tried to track down your apartments and safe houses, see if we could find you there. I was on my way here when I saw Donna. But you left and I got curious and I…” he stared down at their feet, his shoulders hunched. “Why wouldn’t you tell us you’re a dad Jay?”

It felt like the world was crashing down around him, like the elevator was rocking and swaying and not making any progress to his floor at all. Dick’s ragged breathing sounded like thunder in the small space, loud and terrifying and ready to strike.

He shook his head, willing the sensations to cease, willing himself to just breathe, to answer the question and be done with it. Dick would go away after that. But he’d tell Bruce, he’d tell everyone, and it’d all be over.

“Please,” he heard himself say, heard himself beg, “please don’t tell Bruce.”

“What? But Bruce—”

“Will take her  _ away _ .”

Dick stared at him, shock written clear as day across his face. The elevator finally reached their floor, and with it he seemed to finally understand. “Okay,” he agreed, stepping out. They walked down the hall, silent in spite of Jason’s internal freak out. “What’s her name?”

“Lian,” he choked out.

“Who’s her mom?”

It was then that he realized Dick had literally no idea what was going on, had probably just peeked in the window. If anything he seemed to be under the impression that Jason had just had a kid the old fashioned way, that Lian was his in every sense of the word. He wouldn’t be the first, most saw her black hair and green eyes and assumed they were his. It made sense that Dick would too without getting a good, proper look at her.

At least he knew Donna and Kori hadn’t told him. If anyone could keep a secret it was those two.

“Not around,” he said as he dug his keys out of his pocket.

Dick stared back flabbergasted. “What? What the hell do you—”

“Language.”

“—mean ‘not around’? She just dropped her own daughter and bailed?”

“Pretty much.”

Dick’s face contorted, that old temper of his making its way to the surface at the idea of such an injustice. “What’s her name?” he demanded.

“Dick it’s not important.”

“Yes it is Jason. Who is she? We can find her, bring her back.”

“Why? So  _ she _ can take Lian? No thanks Dick.”

“Yeah? Well it’s not exactly fair that you’re here taking care of your daughter while she’s off doing whatever.”

“Are you seriously suggesting I get her to pay _child_ _support_? _Really_? Dick I don’t know if you remember this, but,” he leaned in close, whispering conspiratorially, “I was kind of a crime lord a while back. Remember? Bazooka, Black Mask, there was a duffle bag at some point? Trust me, money isn’t an issue.” He leaned back, finally sliding his key into place. “I made my decision when she gave me Lian. That little girl, my daughter, she comes first. I don’t care about her mom, I don’t care about myself or you or Bruce or anyone else. She’s what matters.”

“Jason…”

“Dick, just…After everything that happened, after Biz and Artemis, after Roy, I just…She comes first, not me.”

Dick wanted to say something, had opened his mouth to, but by then Jason had opened the door and was entering his apartment. He was greeted by Donna and Kori, along with Lian’s call of “Daddy!” He scooped her up, swaying around as he hummed a tune. He caught Dick’s eye, saw the surprise morph into relief then happiness.

“Lian,” he said as he held her on his hip. “Guess what?”

“Wha?” she asked, and Dick about melted as he set their bags down.

“I have someone here to see you. He came all the way across the city to see you, isn’t that cool?”

She nodded vigorously, excitement making her bounce.

“This is your Uncle Dick.” He turned, gesturing towards Dick. She followed the gesture, squealing when she saw him.

“Hello,” she said after she squirmed down. “I Lian.” She held out her little hand just like she’d seen Jason do countless times before.

Dick shook it as delicately as he could. “Hi. I, uh, I’m Dick.”

“Dick?”

“Yes, just like that.”

“Tha’s a funny name.”

He chuckled and patted her head. “I suppose it is, huh?”

The visit quickly turned into a sleepover as Dick was reluctant to leave. It was obvious he felt guilty, made it known later when it was just the two of them left awake.

“Just don’t tell Bruce and we’re even,” Jason grumbled.

A spark of an idea entered Dick’s eyes. “And the others?”

Jason rolled his eyes and threw his head back. “Seriously?”

“I’m just saying, it would make things easier I’m sure.”

“Thanks but no thanks, last thing I need is loose lips or one of them to be tailed here.” He looked pointedly at Dick. “Lian doesn’t need that kind of stress.”

“…don’t you miss them?”

It almost made him laugh. Of course he did, but he also missed Roy and Artemis and Biz and they sure as hell weren’t coming back. He missed waking up in the manor, knowing he was safe and loved, missed doing his homework while Bruce did his paperwork beside him. None of that meant he’d be willing to let Bruce in again.

“It doesn’t matter if I miss ‘em,” he grumbled. “They definitely aren’t missing me.”

“That’s not true and you know it.”

“It’s not? Is that why you’re here? Because you ‘missed me’? Or is it because you didn’t trust me? Did you ‘miss me’ when I was in Arkham? Because last I remember none of you cared enough to check in and make sure I wasn’t bein’ tortured or something.”

“We would’ve know.”

“No, you wouldn’t.” He sighed, looking to the ceiling as though looking for answers. They needed to end this conversation. Kori and Donna were sleeping in the next room over, and Lian one away from that. “Just can it, okay? If I want to see any of them I’ll let you know.” 

Dick relaxed, seeming content with the answer. Jason gave it a month before the first Bat found them.

* * *

It didn’t even take three weeks.

He woke up to a dark apartment, surely no later than four in the morning, and he bolted out of bed, grabbing the knife he kept in his nightstand. Someone was in the apartment, he could feel it, like a hand running down his spine. That sense, whatever it was, had always been there, brought on by necessity in his childhood, then honed and perfected after his dunk in the Lazarus Pit. Yet somehow it had gotten even stronger, more intense, since Lian had entered his life. His “dad instincts” Donna had called them. He’d originally taken it as a joke, but she was more than serious. 

She was the one with prior experience, he was willing to take her word for it.

It was those instincts that told him the intruder, whoever they were, was in the hallway. Well, whoever they were, they were about to get a knife to the fucking throat. 

He slammed his door open, heard a grunt of pain from the impact, and shouldered the second figure to the floor. The one behind the door came at him, a shadow rushing through the darkness, and he let them disarm him so as to grab and twist them to the ground. He almost succeeded but the shadow managed to break the hold on one of their wrists, and he found he had to avoid their attacks now.

By the time he got them into a semblance of a chokehold he could hear Lian’s sheets being readjusted, could hear the noises that showed she was awake. It made him squeeze that much tighter, the panic over Lian’s safety helping him ignore the elbows and fists to his stomach, the teeth drawing blood, the feet bruising his shines and possibly breaking his foot.

Something hit him in the back, causing him to finally let go of the shadow. He turned, rage seething from every pore, only to be blinded as the lights were hit.

“Oh my god, Jason,” came a familiar panicked voice. “It’s just us.”

He squinted his eyes enough to see that, yes, his ears weren’t deceiving him. That was Stephanie Brown in all her eggplant purple glory staring him down with what looked like genuine fear in her eyes. He turned to find Cass leaning against the wall, coughing as she tried to regain the breath Jason had stolen from her. Oh no, no no no, why  _ now _ ? Why couldn’t the Bats just  _ leave him alone _ ?

He was going to have to move, wasn’t he? It was the only way. Get out of Gotham, get rid of the Bats. But could he really? Was that even possible? And Lian was happy here, she was making friends, or at least seemed to be. It’d be cruel to take that away.

“Jason, I, we’re so sorry,” Steph said as she grabbed his arm to help pull him up. “If we’d have known…”

He pulled his arm free, peering into Lian’s room to find she was thankfully still asleep. Okay, good, she wasn’t awake. Crisis averted.

“So you’re saying you two breaking into my apartment and checking out my things is alright so long as I don’t have a kid around?” he hissed.

They looked between each other, Steph showing obvious nervousness, though there seemed to at least be some level of discomfort for Cass. “No,” Steph finally answered, “you’re right.”

“Wanted to know why Dick keep disappearing,” Cass said. “Follow him here.”

Great, just great. Jason told him this would happen, and would you look at that?

“Is anyone else with you?”

“No,” they said together.

“Anyone know where you were heading?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

Steph shrugged, her eyes darting over to Cass for confirmation. Only her face was pinched. “Not followed,” Cass answered. “But masks…”

Jason groaned putting his face in his hands. The masks always had cameras in them so Bruce could review later. They might not have been followed, but they didn’t need to be.

“Can you clear the recording?”

Step blew air out of her nose. “You’re joking right?”

Great, that’s just great. They couldn’t, but who else was there? Tim? But that would mean letting him in on what was happening, which he was not a fan of. Bruce was an absolute no, he was the reason the footage needed to be scrubbed to begin with. There was Barbara, but she’d start asking questions too, and then she’d invite herself to his whereabouts and find out what he was doing. “Checking up on him” she’d call it. Definitely not something he wanted. So that left…

“Alfred?” Cass asked, coming to the same conclusion.

“Yes,” he groaned. “Let him know, get the footage scrubbed. I’m available all day Friday when he inevitably decides to come over.”

The girls agreed easily enough, and with that he could breathe at least a little easier, although adding not just one, not just two, but three people to his circle of secrets didn’t make him feel too secure. In fact, he felt quite the opposite. But beggars couldn’t be choosers, and it was either this or risk Bruce’s wrath. He’d rather take this.

So that’s how he wound up in a cramped apartment, with six other grown ass adults all crowding around his daughter like she was the chosen one. Alfred had honest to god shed a few tears when Lian greeted him and tried asking his name. Originally Jason had planned on taking him to that little tea shop down the road that he liked so they could catch up and Jason could explain everything. The others had all jumped at the chance to watch Lian for him, so he’d been set in his plan. But that was easily forgotten as Alfred wasn’t about to leave the apartment for at least a few hours.

“I understand your hesitation to tell Master Bruce, and that you may not view your relationship as familial any longer,” Alfred said as he prepared the tea. “But you are still my grandson.”

“Which makes her your great-granddaughter,” Jason responded.

Alfred nodded. “I worried that I might never see the day to be frank. With the lives you all lead, it wouldn’t be a surprise if you had all chosen to remain without children.”

But that was the thing wasn’t it? Alfred was right. Their work as vigilantes, fighting crime, going against all these criminals and supervillains, it would never make for a good home life, not with the constant stress, the danger. “Well, now you know why the Red Hood’s been missing for so long,” he said.

Alfred looked back at him with a smile, so much more aged than the last time they’d seen each other. “And you look much happier for it.” He picked up the small tray, ready to serve even outside of his own home. “I am so proud of you Master Jason.”

He could only nod as he followed, surrounded by the laughs and cheers of his family and his daughter.

* * *

By Lian’s second birthday more people knew, and by that point Jason couldn’t tell if he was more worried about  _ if _ Bruce found out or  _ when _ . With this group it was only a matter of time before the beans were spilled. 

Aside from Bruce and Kate all the Bats knew, and for all his fears of having them around, they made sure to keep the cape talk to a minimum. With that came more of the Titans, what with Dick finally realizing that Jason wasn’t Lian’s biological father. It was pretty clear when it clicked in Dick’s head, his eyes trained on an old picture of Roy while the others played with Lian. Dick never said anything about it, but there was a clear shift in how he talked about Lian’s mother afterwards, namely that he never did again.

By the time mid August rolled around his apartment was over run and he was worried he’d need to find a new place. This clearly wasn’t big enough anymore, not if more people were going to keep coming over so often.

And then Dick let it slip about his birthday, and all hell broke loose.

They needed a party, they’d all decided, a two day extravaganza. What luck that Jason was born on the sixteenth and Lian the seventeenth? The stars must have aligned, there was no other explanation.

He hated parties, hated how loud they got, how crazy people could be, but seeing the excitement on everyone’s faces he couldn’t say no. And when Donna declared she and Lian were going out present shopping for him, he had no way to deny them. Donna claimed it was Lian’s idea, and honestly he wouldn’t be surprised if it was.

So he let them make their plans, let them find a place big enough to handle so many people at once that also happened to be child safe. They decided on Titans Tower, the building more than big enough for so many people. He managed to convince them to only throw one party, on only one day. It took a lot of back and forth, but they gave in eventually. 

That’s how Jason found himself in that old tower that he hadn’t seen in years, with cartoons playing on the tv and pizza flowing off the tables, surrounded by the people that actually seemed to care about him, even if it was just a little bit.

Thankfully the group had agreed not to go overboard with the presents, not wanting to overload Lian. She’d loved every single one she got, and she made sure they knew it. Then the attention shifted to him and his usual discomfort came back. He wasn’t supposed to be the center of attention, never. The last time he’d gotten a birthday present he was turning fifteen, over nine years ago. It felt wrong.

But then Alfred and Dick handed him some of his favorite books, and Tim gave him a new laptop with all the upgrades and software he could ever need, and Damian came up and handed him an envelope saying it was from him and Talia and that about sent Jason’s eyebrows into his hair line. The gifts came, purposeful and sentimental, and then there was Lian with her little box.

He scooped her up and set her on his thigh, kissing her forehead. “What’d you get me Princess?” he asked.

She squinted her eyes at him in an adorable mimicry of his own calculating stare. “Can’t tell you  _ that _ ,” she scolded. “I’s a present.”

He chuckled and ruffled her hair. “That it is,” he agreed. “Can I see it?”

She pushed it at him, watching intently as he tore into the wrapping paper. He shot a playful glare at Donna, knowing full well she was the one to coach Lian through what to say. They’d probably been practicing those lines for the past few days.

The wrapping paper came away, and with it he was faced with a little accordion picture frame. He lifted it up, finding each frame filled with pictures, pictures of Lian, of them together, of them and the others, some of the Bats or the Titans. Then there were the ones with Roy, with that smile that looked so much like Lian’s, with his arms around Jason and Kori, with them on their island, at the casino, flying through the air. Then there was the one that only Kori could have taken, the one of Jason and Roy just laughing and holding each other close, the one that showed just how deep Jason had gotten, how far he’d fallen.

“Daddy?”

Lian’s worried voice pulled him from the picture, her eyes staring up at him in concern. He pulled her close and kissed the crown of her head, resting his cheek there. “I’m okay,” he whispered.

“But you cry,” she said.

“Daddy just really likes your gift, that’s all.” He pulled back, smiling down at her. “Thank you Lian. I love it.”

She nodded, still confused by his tears, but more than willing to accept his hug. “Love you Daddy.”

The others around them ceased to exist in that moment, their stares and their whispering fading into nothing. “I love you too.”

* * *

Visiting Roy’s grave was always a difficult endeavor. He couldn’t go on the day of his death or his funeral, never, it felt wrong for so many reasons. Not only would he run the risk of running into others like Queen or Lance, it just didn’t feel right to visit someone so full of life on the day it had been taken away. So he’d made the decision to visit on Roy’s birthday instead.

The October winds bit into his cheeks as he walked through the cemetery, the flowers held tightly in his hand. He had the feeling it would be an early snowfall this year. It wouldn’t be the strangest thing to happen.

The gravestone was as he remembered it from the year before, not too big but not too small, sturdy, with an arrow engraved above Roy’s name. He would’ve liked that, Jason was sure. The stone was smooth on his fingers, sleek and without defects. Queen had shelled out the money for it, for all of it, likely that guilt from their rocky and sometimes non-existent relationship making him intent on doing right by Roy now. Jason wouldn’t know, he hadn’t gone to the funeral, he couldn’t. It hurt too much to think about.

The idea of seeing Roy’s lifeless body, propped in that box, looking for all the world like he was only asleep, and then to see that box closed, put into the ground to never be seen again… He couldn’t bear the thought. He’d lost enough sleep and tears at hearing what happened. Having it be right there in front of him, forcing him to relive it so close to when it had happened, he couldn’t. And with Bruce and the other “heroes” there, well his decision had practically been made for him.

The flowers were placed at the foot of the head stone, the carnations, hydrangeas, and lilacs spreading out on the grass. Kori had helped him pick the flowers, being his voice when it inevitably gave out in the flower shop the night before. The poor guy handling the flowers looked so lost as Kori asked about the different flowers and their meanings. Jason felt guilty the entire time, but Kori kept a firm hold on his hand.

It was so obvious she knew what had been going on with him, knew of the thoughts and feelings and desires that had been swirling around in his head for years, the flowers made that clear enough. Hell, the pictures she gave Donna and Lian for his present was indication enough. But she never said anything, just made herself available, made it known that she was there when he was ready.

Maybe it was time he moved on. Roy wasn’t coming back, and even if he did what was going to happen? Nothing, that’s what. Jason would flake out just as he did before, hide behind a mask of friendship, and that’d be that. No matter what happened, he’d never get that happy ending he wanted with Roy. Raising Lian, that didn’t change anything.

He heard a rustle to the side, a gasp of surprise. Looking up he found Dinah Lance approaching.

“Jason?” she asked as she got closer.

He said nothing, just watched her. He finally nodded, muttered a quiet, “Dinah,” when she was in front of him.

She stared at him in confusion, like he was some mystery she was trying to figure out. Minutes passed before she spoke again. “You’re alive.”

He recoiled at the statement, completely unaware of where it had come from. What the hell,  _ alive _ ? Why wouldn’t he be? “Yes?”

She shook her head, her face still that open puzzlement. “Sorry, it’s just, you’ve been gone for, well, awhile. We started to think…”

“No, it’s okay,” he said, looking to the side. Shit, how much could he say? Surely whatever he told her would be forwarded to the League. “I’ve been, uh, busy.”

“Busy?” She clearly expected something not quite legal to be connected to the word. God, he couldn’t even stay out of trouble without being suspicious, could he?

“Personal stuff. Red Hood’s retired,” he stated, hands clenching in his pockets. “Has been for a while now.”

Dinah nodded, taking the answer for what it was. She turned to the grave, eyes catching on the flowers laid there. “You two were close.”

“He was my best friend. He… understood.”

She accepted the answer with a sad smile, leaning down to place her own flowers. “He deserved better,” she said. “You both did.”

They fell into silence, both staring down at Roy’s headstone together. So many opportunities, so many chances they could have had, all gone, all because of one event.

“Come to dinner with me,” Dinah said suddenly.

“No, I really couldn’t.”

“Please, I insist. The food’s already covered. Ollie had to run off for some emergency, he won’t be around. We can catch up. I’d love to hear what you’ve been up to lately.”

He ducked his head, shaking it once more as he took a step back. “I’m sorry, I really can’t. I need to be back in Gotham in a few hours. Kori’s supposed to pick me up soon.”

Dinah hummed in interest. “What are you two up to? You’re a bit old for tick or treating.” She laughed a little at whatever image went through her mind. “Or are you finally entering the party scene?”

He stared back at her, studied her face, her easy smile, thought back to all their interactions before, how kind she’d been to him as a child, how her first reaction to seeing him here had been to talk rather than fight. “I have a daughter,” he admitted.

The smile dropped from her face, a look of shock taking its place. “So, the reason you’ve been missing…”

“Is because I’ve been raising her, yeah.”

“And Bruce doesn’t know.”

“No.”

She nodded, looking off to the side, ideas running around in her mind. “Well,” she settled on, “I have to admit, I wasn’t expecting that.”

He chuckled. “You and everyone else.”

“Others know?”

“Kori, Donna, most of the Bats, the Titans, that’s mostly it.”

“Interesting.” She tapped her chin. Kori could be seen in the air, her hair creating a streak of orange as she approached. “There’s going to be a party at the end of December,” she told him, “up on the Watchtower. Big annual holiday party. You should come.”

“Uh, thanks but no thanks, there’s no way I could—”

“Jason, you can’t keep hiding. You have a child, you deserve to not live in hiding,  _ she _ deserves to not have her father in hiding. I won’t tell anyone, but I think it would be good for you, take a weight off your shoulders.”

“And if something happens?”

“It won’t,” she assured him, “anyone tries anything they’ll be dealing with me.”

He nodded slowly. Kori landed beside them, staring curiously between them. 

“I’ll think about it,” he promised, letting Kori pick him up.

“Here,” she handed him a card, a number written on it. “Call me later, okay?”

“Sure.”

They nodded once more, waved their good byes, and with that Kori began to fly them back to Gotham for their night of Halloween movies, candy, and costumes.

* * *

Jason hadn’t worn a suit in so long, he almost forgot what it felt like. Honestly, after letting Dinah and Kori convince him to go to this party he was planning on just buying something off the rack somewhere. It wasn’t like he was planning on using it much. He could splurge on Lian, but that was it. He wasn’t expecting to be at this party for long any way, just enough to show his face, let everyone meet Lian, ensure no one thought he was up to something, then maybe grab some food before he left.

Alfred wasn’t having any of that. He and Dinah drug Jason off to a tailor with Lian bouncing along beside them. Apparently Alfred had canceled his plans with Bruce for the day to do it. Jason almost felt bad. He could remember how busy Bruce was years ago, he couldn’t imagine how much worse it had gotten since. 

Bruce was a grade A workaholic, and having any slight disruption to that work could have a massive ripple effect. But Dick and the others were busy distracting him and forcing him to rest for the day, so Jason couldn’t feel too bad, especially when Alfred mentioned how little the man was resting again. The holiday season always seemed to do that, between the extra difficulty in crime fighting in the cold, ice, and snow, trying to plan and coordinate the League’s annual winter party, and all the additional WE work he no doubt took over, he never failed to over extend himself.

“He can wait one more day Master Jason,” Alfred assured him. “The world isn’t going to end tonight.” 

Jason couldn’t help but roll his eyes at the choice of words. They’d had enough close calls with world ending incidents. Technically, it was always possible for them.

The tailor was one he remembered from his days as Bruce’s son. A nice old man who was always willing to take his time, especially with new and younger clients. He smiled at Jason, just as he’d done years before, and the nerves this trip had built began to diminish ever so slightly.

Getting his measurements was as awkward as ever, especially when the man gave a concerned look at the scars that peeked out of his sleeves and neckline. But the tailor, just as he always did with Bruce and likely all the other Bats, didn’t question it. This was Gotham after all, everyone had their scars.

Next was choosing the cut and the fabric and at that point Jason let Alfred take full control. He knew which materials would be best for him, what would be breathable yet conservative enough for his tastes. He knew the materials would line up with whatever Bruce liked, that was one preference Jason had picked up from him all those years ago that he just couldn’t seem to get rid of. 

It put a weird feeling in his stomach, one he couldn’t quite recognize. Nostalgia? Sadness? Guilt?

He pushed it aside, focusing on the fabric swatches and patterns.

Somehow they convince him to go for a three piece, and all the guilt over letting Alfred and Dinah pay for everything only got worse. But they insisted, saying the vest framed his shoulders and waist well, that it would be an outrage not to get it. And with the deep maroon shirt he would wear? Oh, Lian would be going home with a mother for sure.

“Or another dad,” Dinah added into her coffee cup.

Alfred agreed, smiling at his grandson. “Or a father.”

It was all the approval he needed.

Then came the time for Lian’s dress, and the tailor couldn’t hold back his squeal of excitement. He’d mostly been relegated to men’s wear over the years. Having a chance to create a dress, let alone for one so young, was cause for excitement.

It was an odd thing to get excited about, Jason thought, considering Lian wouldn’t be able to wear it for very long. If they weren’t careful she might not even make it to the party with how fast she was growing. Whatever the case, the tailor was happy, Alfred and Dinah were happy, and most importantly Lian was happy.

Anticipation worked its way into his gut, and he found himself oddly looking forward to the party. As nervous as he felt about it, he was more eager to finally be there, to put himself out there, to not feel like he had to look over his shoulder every few minutes. Kori, Dick, and Donna had all agreed to arrive with him, if for nothing else than to keep everyone from freaking out. Alfred had already promised to take Lian if she got too scared the day of. For how friendly she could be, too many new faces all at once was beginning to freak her out a bit. He couldn’t blame her, it freaked him out too.

But putting that suit on, with his hair done and the new watch on his wrist, he felt ready. He wasn’t some kid or teenager anymore, he hadn’t been in years. He was self reliant, had gone through hell and back and still managed to come out kind of alright, alright enough to raise a child, to not fuck that up too badly. He wasn’t some sidekick, he didn’t have to stand in Bruce’s shadow anymore. Looking in the mirror, seeing the man that stared back, proved that just a little more. 

So with Lian and her little bag in tow, their little group of five made it through Alfred and Tim’s impromptu photo shoot and into the cave’s boom tube. 

Opening his eyes to see the halls of the Watchtower felt like returning to another life. How long had it been since he’d been here, in the Justice League’s headquarters? How long since he first looked out the command center’s windows and saw Earth staring back?

Dick and Kori stepped out first, met with greetings and compliments. Donna look over to him, a smirk on her lips.

“Ready tiger?”

Lian gave her best growl, her hands held up like claws. “Ready, grrr.”

Jason and Donna laughed together, and as Jason secured his hold on Lian he felt Donna slip her elbow in his.

“Time to make those hearts throb,” Donna sing songed.

They stepped out to the sound of distant chatter and music, J’onn J’onzz’s greeting turning surprised as he took in the trio. Donna just waved as she pulled Jason along. Kori and Dick were already heading for the party, scoping it out for them.

They found them in the Watchtower’s common area, along with seemingly everyone else. People turned to greet them only to do a double take, a few managing to drop their glasses. Eyes stayed glued to them even as Donna dragged them to the table Kori and Dick had secured. A few people attempted to greet them, some managing to succeed, but most horrendously failed. Jason couldn’t blame them, Donna looked stunning in that dress. He wouldn’t be able to say much either.

She laughed beside him, her eyes roaming the room as he set Lian down on the chair. “Gods, you’d think they’d never seen a good looking man in a suit before.”

“Nah, they probably just forgot how beautiful you look even off the battlefield.”

She swatted his arm playfully. “Stop you.”

“Why don’t you make me?”

“You made it!” Dinah’s excited voice entered their space. Soon enough she was there, pulling Jason into a hug, then following suit with Donna and Lian. “I was worried you might get cold feet.”

“Are you kidding?” he asked light heartedly. “They have free food, of course I was gonna come.”

Their laughter seemed to drive away most of the stares, though more than a few still remained. He looked up, feeling one drilling right into the side of his face, and there was Bruce, an unreadable expression overtaking his features. Jason ducked his head, sent an awkward smile, then turned back to Dinah.

“If he gives you any problems just let me know,” Dinah said. “I’ll deal with him.”

“Auntie Dinah go fight someone?” Lian asked enthusiastically.

“Hopefully not,” Jason answered. “We’re here to have fun, remember?”

“And eat.”

“And eat, yes.”

“Seriously Jason,” Dinah said with a hand on his shoulder. “If anything is wrong, just tell me.”

“Will do.”

With that she took her leave, sending one last glare Bruce’s way. She would absolutely fight him, Jason knew she would, but he honestly hoped it didn’t come to that. He was tired of fighting Bruce, tired of fighting in general. He’s fought for the right to exist for so long, he didn’t feel like he should have to keep doing it.

Thankfully it wasn’t until much later when Bruce approached him, after he’d gotten a chance to try the food and to mingle for a bit, introduce Lian to some of the others, get the usual congratulations, all that jazz. A few noticed Roy’s features, asking how Jason managed that, but he refused to explain. Lian knew Jason as her dad, she didn’t need these numbskulls making her doubt that. He could explain later, when she wasn’t around.

By the time Bruce made it over Lian was starting to get tired out. Kori took it as her chance for some Lian time, taking her off to their little table so Jason could continue his rounds. He felt Bruce’s presence before he saw him, and that’s really the only thing that kept him from jumping. 

“Jason, how are you?” he asked, not quite Batman and not quite Brucie Wayne, somewhere in between, where he could force a smile but not be an idiot when he did.

“I, uh, I’m good,” Jason answered finding his palms suddenly sweaty. “You? How are you?”

“Good. Alfred’s been locking me out of the cave again—”

“Reasonable.”

“—Dick broke another chandelier—”

“Of course he did.”

“—Damian is getting his driving permit soon—”

“God that’s terrifying.”

“—but it’s mostly the usual.”

They fell into a strange silence then, not comfortable, but not intensely awkward. “How have you been?” Bruce asked before his eyes glanced over to where Kori was holding Lian.

“I think I’m doing alright,” he said, “not like I have the option of screwing up right now.”

“Jason,” Bruce’s voice sounded pained, almost sad even, “why didn’t you say anything? I could’ve been helping you.”

He shook his head, the almost two years flashing through his head, the fear and anxiety coming to the surface. “You don’t want me answering that question Bruce.”

Bruce nodded, his usual confidence overshadowed by that sad, dark look in his eyes, like he’d lost something precious, something he cared about.

Jason didn’t know how to handle that look.

“Fear is a pretty big motivator,” he commented. “Though if anyone would know that I guess it’d be you.”

Regret poured off Bruce in waves, his voice coated in it. “I never should have put you in that position. You’re my son, you’re supposed to trust me, but I… I’m sorry.”

Jason stared at him, unsure of how to take the apology. Was he doing this to get close to Jason, so he could get him at his weakest? Or… “Are you just saying that to get close to Lian?”

“No, not at all. I’ve been… _ working _ on myself lately. I wanted to reach out, but by then you’d gone underground for almost a year. I figured you didn’t want to be reached, so I didn’t go looking. I’d already done so much to harm the fragile relationship we still had, I didn’t want to risk making it any worse.”

Jason accepted the explanation with a nod. He wasn’t going to sit here and psychoanalyze Bruce and his motivations. No, he didn’t need to do that, not for this.

“Her name is Lian?” Bruce asked to break the silence.

“Yup. Lian Harper Todd.”

“Harper for…”

“Yeah.”

They fell back into silence, both sipping their wine in an effort not to talk and ruin the little moment they had. What the hell did you even follow that up with? God, he missed the days when this came naturally, when he knew what to say to make Bruce smile, to take that look out of his eyes.

It seemed someone was looking down on him for once, at least enough to grant that one wish.

“Spooky!”

Arms wrapped around Bruce’s neck as Hal Jordan pressed into his back in a hug, hanging off of Bruce as he lifted his feet off the ground. Then something else happened, something Jason hadn’t seen in years: that darkness and sadness faded from Bruce’s eyes, replaced with  _ something else _ . Aw shit, it was happening again, wasn’t it? And Bruce, being the idiot he was, wasn’t going to say anything. 

Lord give Hal patience with this man.

“Hey kid,” Hal greeted as he released Bruce. “How you been? Haven’t heard anything in a while.”

“I’ve been, uh, around,” he answered. “I’ve got a few more priorities now that kind of take precedence over the mask, that’s all.”

Hal nodded his understanding, his arm somehow still resting on Bruce’s shoulder, and it didn’t take a rocket scientist to know Bruce had it bad. You didn’t just lean on Bruce if he didn’t like you. Hell, you couldn’t lean on him even if he  _ did _ . Then again, if their newcomer was anything to go by, Bruce might not be the only one with a problem.

Kyle Rayner held out a plate of food to Hal, his eyes wide and glued to Jason. He tried to say something, winding up with an incomprehensible stutter instead. Hal just laughed, clapped Kyle on the shoulder, then turned back to keep talking to Jason. Jason tried to ignore Kyle, tried to focus on Hal’s voice and the way Bruce’s hand was clenching between them, but the weight of Kyle’s eyes combined with the too small and too bright shirt just made it impossible.

Kyle wouldn’t have just constructed a shirt, that’d be stupid, but the way it clung to him, the way it showed off his waistline and muscles in that bright green, he couldn’t be too sure. Then there were his eyes, and that face, and that god damned hair. In the years since he’d first met the Lantern Jason was sure he’d gotten rid of whatever desire he’d felt for the man, that crush eradicated with their separation. But here they were, and there went his heart.

But thinking of his heart and feelings always led back to Roy, to his smile and the way he laughed, how comfortable he was around Jason despite everything. What the hell was he doing letting himself get hung up on Rayner? He hadn’t even talked to the prick in years, he didn’t get to affect Jason this way. 

Even if the shirt was intentional.

He made an excuse, saying he needed to check up on Lian, what with it almost being her bed time, and beat a hasty retreat. He could feel their eyes on him, but soon enough it was only one pair. His neck felt like it was on fire, like Kyle was burning him from the inside out with nothing more than those eyes of his. He needed a distraction,  _ now. _

He took Lian from Kori, waving her off to go dance with Dick, and then it was just him and Lian and the stupid eyes watching him from across the room.

“Daddy, you okay?” Lian asked as she rubbed her eyes.

“I’m okay darling. Just a little overloaded right now.” And a little overheated if he was being honest. He slipped his suit jacket off, somehow managing it without disturbing his hold on Lian too much. His sleeves were rolled up as far as he could put them, and for the moment he felt at least a little cooler.

“Overloaded?”

“Too many people,” he said as he pulled her to rest against his shoulder. “Daddy doesn’t know if he can talk to everyone.”

“Worried?”

“Yes, I’m a little worried too. But I have you, so we’ll be okay.”

She nodded, letting out a big yawn as she sunk into his chest.

“Tired?”

“No, I okay,” she argued even as her eyes fought to close.

“We can go home, I don’t mind.”

“But your friends.”

“I can talk to them later. Besides, Daddy’s getting tired too. He needs his beauty sleep.”

She giggled, and with that Jason stood up and started making his way out of the room and back to the boom tubes. He said his good bye’s as he went, Lian trying to as well but giving up after about four people. They made it back to Gotham, and then their apartment easily enough. 

It wasn’t until the next day, when he was staring at his suit on its hangers, that he realized he forgot his jacket.

* * *

It took about a week, but the jacket came back. Attached to it was Kyle shifting awkwardly in his doorway. Charming as ever this one was.

Jason would have laughed at the absurdity of it all. A Green Lantern, nervous? Uncomfortable? Anxious? Very funny. These guys lived on uncertainty and adventure, they ignored fear like it was a bad fashion trend. To have one here, looking so out of place, so unsure, it was ridiculous. 

He invited Kyle inside, figured he’d already started making lunch, it wouldn’t kill him to add a third plate. Kyle just kind of stared as he went about his business, seeming so out of place in Jason’s apartment despite his completely normal appearance. Then again, they’d only really had one interaction years prior, and they hadn’t been the most civil all things considered. The idea of Jason being  _ domestic _ of all things would surely make anyone pause.

“So, um,” Kyle began awkwardly, his eyes caught in a loop between Jason, the table, and the pictures on the fridge. “Where’s, uh…”

“Lian,” Jason finished for him. “She’s asleep.”

“Isn’t it a bit late?”

“She’s two, she hasn’t exactly gotten a handle on the normal sleep routine thing. Considering the amount of rest I got that first year, she can sleep for  _ as long _ as she wants.”

Kyle laughed weakly at the joke. “So, the dad thing isn’t affecting your, uh, other job too much then?”

Looking back at him, Jason had to wonder what he was talking about. Other job? What job had he ever held? Outside of the little bits of work here and there that Talia sent him, he didn’t exactly have a packed resume. Unless… “You mean Red Hood?”

“Yeah, I mean, you aren’t just gonna give it up, that much is obvious.”

“Actually…”

Kyle stared at him in shock, his expression the pure embodiment of a blue screen. “No way,” he argued, “there is no way in hell you would give that up.”

“That’s one for the swear jar.”

“Excuse me  _ what _ ?”

“Swear jar, one dollar. I’m raising a kid man, I’ve gotta at least try and act responsible with the language in this place.” He sauntered over to Kyle, enjoying the way he stared, how he gulped and wet his lips as Jason got near. Jason leaned in, putting his lips right next to Kyle’s ear. He knew he was playing it up, knew he might be going a bit far with this, but when would he get another chance like this? “Besides, I’m sure you have better things to use that voice of yours for.”

Kyle practically deflated against the wall when Jason turned back with a grin. Oh, he was so easy to rile up, wasn’t he? Why hadn’t he tried this earlier?

“Okay, okay,” Kyle said through shaky breaths. “So you’re not Red Hood anymore.”

“Nope, haven’t been for a while.”

“Then how…”

Jason turned back to him, finding him gesturing towards Jason’s… everything.

“How are you still so damn—”

“Two dollars.”

“—built? You’re like a brick house over there, my god.”

Jason raised a brow. “Are you insinuating something?”

Kyle shook his head furiously, clearly freaking out a little. “No, it’s just, how do you still have… thighs just aren’t made like that, you have to work for them and you don’t get arms like that from just lifting a kid. Freaking how?”

“You saying I’m a DILF Rayner? Cause if so, I’m gonna need you to take me to dinner first.”

Kyle’s expression flat lined, then something clicked. His face erupted into a blush. “I, uh, I just, I mean, you’re kinda, uh,” he stammered.

Jason just laughed as he turned to the food. “It’s okay man, it’s just a joke. I work out a lot, that’s all.”

Kyle was by his side so quickly he thought he’d turned into the flash for a second. That familiar determination thrummed through Kyle, absolutely radiating off of him. “Well, I’m being serious. Are you free Saturday night?”

It was Jason’s turn to stare in shock. Sure, he made a joke, but surely Kyle didn’t really want to do  _ that _ . He’d made it pretty obvious he wanted nothing to do with him before, just as Kyle had to him, so why was he here now? “I, are you, ugh, it’s just—”

“We has friend for lunch?” 

Lian’s voice saved him from answering the question. “Yes Princess,” he answered, his voice far higher than it had any right being. He set her up on the counter next to him, brushing her hair back. “This is Kyle. He works with your Aunt Donna sometimes.”

“Really? That’s so cool!” she declared, her eyes beaming as she stared at Kyle.

He clearly knew Jason was avoiding his question, knew he was using his daughter as a shield, but he wouldn’t say anything, not with Lian around. That much was made obvious when he pulled a seat up to the counter and let her begin her round of twenty questions.

Good, crisis averted. One less thing Jason had to worry about.

* * *

Except it wasn’t averted.

By the next day Donna was asking about Kyle, if he wanted to see him sometime, just the two of them, catch up and all that. She’d watch Lian for him, no questions asked. She’d even be willing to stay the night, or take Lian to her place, she’d added with a knowing wink.

He’d made up every excuse he could, not that any of them held up under scrutiny. Outside of the off the record translation jobs Talia had him doing, he didn’t have a job. He wasn’t going to school outside of those father-daughter classes he’d been enjoying with Lian. He didn’t have any friends outside of the capes really, he had his neighbors and a few other parents, but none of them were making plans with him. There were a few invitations to barbecues or birthday parties over the years, some to plays or recitals, but none right now. He had no excuse and she knew it.

“Seriously Jason, I know you two didn’t get along that well before, but it’s been almost four years. Even if you want to believe he was some horrible douche he’s had time to change, just like you.” Donna looked at him closely, taking his hand. “Give him a chance, okay? Even if it’s just as friends. He talked and asked so much about you after the party I swear my ears almost fell off. He wants to try, and I get the feeling you do too.”

The words, while they rang true, left a sour taste in his mouth. Yes, he’d like to try, yes he’d be interested if Kyle was, hell if he was being honest he’d been interested since they met. It’s just… could he? Really? It took so much for him to finally admit the extent of his feelings for Roy, to accept that in some corner of his mind he’d always wanted them to be something more. He’d only just come to terms with it. Letting himself feel that again, that closeness, that love, it didn’t feel right after losing it the first time. It felt like spitting in the face of Roy’s memory and all the time they’d shared.

He didn’t say any of that though, knew the pitying looks he’d get if he did. But it seemed Donna picked up on them anyway, saw how his eyes slid to Roy’s picture.

“He’d want you to be happy,” she said.

“I am happy,” he argued weakly.

“Yes, but you’re holding yourself back, not letting yourself really experience life. Roy wouldn’t want you to hold yourself back, especially not like this. If you have a chance for happiness he’d want you to take it, you know that.”

He couldn’t meet her eyes. The words were too true, they hurt too much.

“Think about it, okay? You’ve already given up so much to be Lian’s father. You’re allowed to be selfish once in a while.”

He could only nod his head and clench his fists.

* * *

He thought about it, and then he thought about it some more, and then again and again and again. The amount of times he found himself zoning out staring at the pictures on his walls was immeasurable. By Friday night he wasn’t allowed any more time to think. He either went or he didn’t, Donna told him, and it wasn’t fair to keep Kyle hanging on for an answer.

So it was decided after another back and forth that he’d go. It was just a little diner a ways out, one Kyle found during one of his rare trips into Gotham. Nothing fancy or classy or expensive. It’d just be them, a booth, and a diner filled with however many other people decided to show up that night. No big deal.

Except it kind of was if Jason was reading the situation properly.

He couldn’t blame Donna for not understanding, or anyone else for that matter. They were used to romance, to dating and seeing people, to trying. The last time he’d even considered the possibility had been, well… He’d decided against it for one reason or another back then. That openness, that vulnerability, it terrified him.

But he’d try, that was the least he could do.

Lian deserved better than a coward for a father.

He was early, because of course he was. Old habits died hard, even ones he hadn’t given into in years. He found himself staking the place out, searching for any possible entry and exit points and locating all the cameras as he made his way inside. It never hurt to be prepared, and it at least gave him something to do.

Kyle made it in right as the snow started to pick up, the idiot clearly forgetting it was the beginning of January and that they were in New Jersey of all places. Jason could manage in a jacket or a sweater, he’d done it plenty of times before, but he grew up there, had lived through Gotham’s winters. He was used to it. For how long Kyle had been living in New York, and all his time in space, he was clearly still from California with its beaches and warmth and lack of snow.

Jason held out his coat, not at all surprised when Kyle took it without a second thought. He laughed a bit once Kyle had it on, the man absolutely dwarfed by the material. Jason wasn’t  _ that _ big, was he?

“Sorry,” Kyle muttered as he pulled the coat tighter. “The ring always keeps the cold out, I forget it doesn’t when I’m not using it. You haven’t been waiting long, have you?”

Jason shook his head. “No, just a few minutes,” he lied. It had really been closer to half an hour, but that was if you counted the time spent checking the place out. “Run into any trouble on the way over?”

“No, not unless you count the snow. Sheesh, how do you deal with this stuff every year?”

“Eh, you get used to it.”

Kyle rolled his eyes. “I’ve been ‘dealing with it’ for about seven years now, I’m definitely not used to it.”

“Well how much of that time has actually been spent here?”

“Point taken.”

Conversation went by easily enough, and the anxiety Jason had felt coming into the diner began to slip away. Kyle’s voice just hit something, that joy in his words as he talked about the things he loved, the happiness when talking about the other Lanterns, it put Jason at ease, and he somehow found himself opening up far beyond what he’d intended.

By the time their waitress came by with their check, Jason was completely relaxed, laughing along at whatever joke Kyle was telling, making some of his own. It felt like such a shame to let it end. Even their brief squabble over the check couldn’t stop that feeling.

The sky seemed to feel the same, the snow no longer falling. The surrounding shop lights danced on the snow that was there, the forgotten Christmas lights left up far past their due date.

Kyle took his hand, nodding down the street. “Walk?”

“You sure you won’t get too cold?” Jason answered with a grin.

Kyle just rolled his eyes and pulled Jason along. He obviously had no idea where he was going, but neither seemed to mind.

The streets were blissfully empty, not a soul in sight, and Jason’s thoughts drifted off to the little girl that was hopefully in bed. 

“So, are you and Donna…”

Jason stared back at the question, not quite understanding what Kyle meant. Are Donna and him friends? Close? “What do you mean?”

Kyle made a vague hand gesture, his movements once more screaming of his discomfort. “Are you two together?”

Oh. “No. She’s more like a sister than anything. She helps take care of Lian mostly, gives me a kick in the butt when I need it. That sort of thing.”

Kyle heaved a sigh of relief, rubbing his thumb on the back of Jason’s hand where they were still joined. “In that case, um, do you—”

“ _ Yes _ .”

“Wait, what?”

Jason fought back the nerves, pushed through everything saying this was a bad idea. “I want to do this again.”

Kyle looked at him skeptically, still unsure of his answer. “As friends? Or…”

Jason chewed his lip as he forced himself to keep his eyes on Kyle’s. “More.”

The hand in his squeezed tight, his other soon held in a similar grip. “Me too.”

No shit Sherlock.

He leaned forward, letting their foreheads rest together as he basked in the moment. Had he ever felt like this, with these butterflies dancing in his stomach, that excitement running around in his throat? His mind filled with ideas on what they could do, but he pushed them away. Later, they had time.

“I don’t know if this is too forward,” Kyle whispered as he traced Jason’s jaw, “but can I kiss my new boyfriend?”

Jason didn’t bother answering, just leaned in and let his lips do the talking.

* * *

They kept things slow, or slow for Kyle’s standards. Then again, he didn’t really get much of an option considering he was in space so often. And with Lian, well, any chance Jason might have ever had for spontaneous sex was long gone. Hell, even an out of the blue make out session was a no go if she was in the apartment.

It didn’t matter if she was awake or not, it just felt  _ wrong _ .

And that shit wasn’t happening outside of his bedroom, he didn’t care if it was groping or making out or fucking, it wasn’t happening.

That one seemed to weird Kyle out a bit more than anything else, but he accepted it quickly enough. It wasn’t like he was being relegated to a closet or something. It was Jason’s bedroom, the room that Jason didn’t let anyone into other than him and Lian. If that didn’t mean something, Jason didn’t know what did.

Lian took to Kyle well enough, so well that she’d started to get upset if he was away in space for too long. Jason tried explaining in the simplest way possible, tried telling her that Kyle’s work meant he was gone for long periods of time. Jason missed him too, but he’d be back, they just had to wait. She clearly understood part of it, but that didn’t stop the tears from falling or her toys from flying across the living room.

Her fourth birthday almost didn’t have a party. Kyle had been gone for almost two months, and the poor girl clearly thought she’d been abandoned. Everyone tried to distract her, but it only did so much. To make matters worse, it seemed like she’d finally hit that defiant phase of her toddlerhood, and most days it felt like Jason was fighting a loosing battle.

He was about to call the party quits, to let Lian have her time away from the crowd, but then a flash of green rushed into the room and there was Kyle, disheveled and disoriented. The room was quiet, the silence stretching out as Kyle shouldered his way through, until Lian let out the loudest yell Jason had ever heard from her.

Kyle scooped her up, apologies flying, and Lian just wrapped her arms around his neck and squeezed for all she was worth.

“Don’t go again,” she pleaded. “You make me and Daddy sad.”

“I have to Li,” Kyle said. “There are people I need to help.”

“But me and Daddy miss you.”

“I miss you too, a lot. Hal’s doing his best so I’m not gone so long next time, okay?”

Lian gave a weak nod. “Okay.”

“I’m sorry I took so long,” he said, directing the message to both Lian and Jason. “But, I brought you something.”

Lian’s eyes lit up, and just like that she was back to normal.

“You won’t be able to get rid of him now,” Kori whispered.

“The choice has been made for you Little Wing,” Dick joked beside her. “Let me know if you need help picking out a ring.”

Donna just looked at him knowingly.

Kyle didn’t get a chance for any post-separation action. Lian had been adamant about not letting Kyle out of her sight, and that included at night. So Kyle found himself in the middle of a Todd sandwich, his right arm no doubt falling asleep as Lian laid on it. Jason just chuckled, wrapping his leg up with Kyle’s as he played with the neckline of Kyle’s shirt.

“She really misses you, you know,” he whispered once he was sure Lian was asleep.

“Yeah. I know, it’s just, you know. I can’t just not go when I’m needed. But she deserves to not have her father’s partner disappearing for so long.” He sighed, his eyes drifting down and away from Jason. “Maybe it’d be for the best if we—”

He was cut off as Jason head butted his shoulder. “If you think I’m gonna let you break up with me over something like that, then you’re a bigger idiot than I ever thought you were. And trust me, I thought you were the pinnacle of idiocy at one point or another.”

Kyle stared back, searching for something in Jason’s gaze. Apparently finding it, he relaxed back into the mattress. “You’re right, it’s a stupid idea.”

“Mmm hmm.”

“…you know I love you, right?” Kyle’s question came right as Jason was starting to doze off. “I love you so much, you and Lian both. I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t here.”

“Probably whatever you did before we started going out,” Jason murmured. He laughed, low and quiet. “Yeah, I know. You think I’d let you get away with half the stuff we do together otherwise? You wouldn’t have gotten anywhere close to my pants, let alone my daughter, if I didn’t think you were serious about us.” A yawn pulled itself from his chest, and he dropped his head back on Kyle’s shoulder. “Jus’ go to sleep Kyle. We c’n talk in the morning.”

Kyle nodded, kissing him as well as he could from his position. “I love you.”

“Love you too.”

* * *

Roy’s birthday came and went, and for the first time Jason didn’t go to the cemetery alone. Kyle didn’t say much, too busy keeping an eye on Jason, but that was just one more thing Jason didn’t need to worry about between them. Kyle understood better than anyone the pain Roy’s death had brought, the anguish that there wouldn’t be another day, that there would be no new memories. Alex had been Kyle’s first love, and he’d wanted so much to be better for her, had started working towards that goal. But that was all ripped away in the span of a few short hours.

He of all people couldn’t fault Jason for still holding Roy so close in his heart, for still loving him even now. In some ways he always would, Kyle had said the night Jason told him everything, it was only natural. The feeling of needing him and looking for him every time he entered a room might be diminishing, but to some extent Jason would always love Roy in one way or another.

The flight back was relaxing, and Jason about found himself falling asleep in Kyle’s arms. He could, he knew Kyle wouldn’t mind, but he wanted to enjoy this, all of it. The way Kyle held him close, like he was something precious and worth protecting, the way he rambled about this and that, his voice easily being one of Jason’s favorites, the way his eyes shined when he looked at him, like Jason was the most beautiful thing in the universe, it was all so much. He couldn’t risk missing any of it.

They arrived to an empty apartment, Lian long gone for her night of trick or treating with Kori and Dick. They wouldn’t be back until the next day, allowing Jason and Kyle to enjoy their night together.

The kiss was slower this time, more drawn out as Kyle got him onto his, their, bed. His hands cradled Jason’s face, ran over his shoulders, through his hair, anywhere they could reach. Shirts were removed, and soon enough all that remained was skin, and Kyle hands were burning a path down his body, his lips following, and Jason about lost it right then and there. Every moment, every press of a hand or meeting of lips, every caress to his body and kiss to his scars pushed him higher into his euphoria, and he loved Kyle all the more for it.

Coming down was always a bit of a struggle, especially on these nights when Kyle was that much more attentive and purposeful. The contrast between the pressure being built up, the intensity of everything, and the sudden loosening of his muscles and that voice that always tried to lull him to sleep, it was so strange and he never knew how to respond. Kyle did though, and soon enough Jason was wrapped up in his lover’s arms, riding out the waves of bliss to sleep.

Thoughts sprung into his head as he slipped into unconsciousness, ones filled with white and church bells and promises of forever. Tomorrow, they could handle it tomorrow.

* * *

He finally let himself be talked into taking the GED exam when Lian started first grade. There was a collective sigh of relief from everyone as a result, whether it was because they’d been convinced he’d never do it or because they’d been waiting for so long was unclear.

It wasn’t that he never wanted to do it, or that he never wanted to go on to college. Hell, that’s all he’d really wanted as a kid. But after coming back he just, he needed that extra push, that’s all. And with Lian out for so much of the day, well his earlier excuses began to run dry. The bells in his mind had only gotten louder over the past year, and that itch that ran under his skin, yearning to be set free, was a near constant reality that only got worse when Kyle was around.

It was to the point where he just  _ knew _ when Kyle was close, whether he could see or hear him or not. He could be gone for weeks at a time, but the minute he was on Earth Jason knew. That little talent of his was a bit off putting to most people, himself included, but Kyle only seemed to find it endearing, so Jason tried not to be too worried. 

But somehow that became his push. Between Lian and Kyle and what he hoped for between them, he wanted to do better, to be better. Kyle didn’t care about how educated he was, especially not when he considered Jason’s actual knowledge and skillset. Jason’s papers might regard him as a high school drop out —what else could be written? Definitely not “murdered but got better” —but the things he knew went far beyond what any drop out should know. But it didn’t feel like enough, not when he was dropping off Lian for her first day of school, or when Kyle talked about introducing him to other Green Lanterns.

He needed to do this, if for nothing else than to make sure those two wouldn’t be judged.

When it came time for the actual test it was clear he’d been overreacting. Some of the others taking the exam were struggling, that was obvious, but it was easy enough fro him, and he walked out knowing he’d passed with flying colors. By the time Kyle returned from his mission Jason had his results. Kyle kissed him in that way only he could, pouring everything into it, and Jason knew he’d made the right decision.

Kyle insisted they eat out that night, and somewhere nice too. This was cause for celebration after all right? And if a celebration called for anything it was fancy food and Jason in that suit Kyle loved so much. And oh, Kyle made no secret of checking him out.

“Perfect,” he said dreamily when Jason came out of his bedroom. Then again, he said that when Jason was naked too, so it clearly wasn’t the suit he was talking about.

Dinner went by as per usual, with the few odd looks here and there. It wasn’t that common to have a five year old in such an establishment after all, and it certainly wasn’t expected to see two men together outside of a business meal. Gotham might not be the most conservative of cities, but it had it circles.

It was when they were heading back home, taking their time strolling through the park and walking off their desserts, that the excitement really kicked up. Kyle slipped something in his pocket, rewrapping his arm around Jason’s. Lian seemed to be buzzing with energy from his other side, squeezing his hand in her excitement.

Jason looked down to the pocket then back to Kyle puzzled.

“I know we haven’t talk about it much, but well,” Kyle stammered as he ducked his head, “whenever you’re ready, it’s right there.”

Jason pulled them to a stop, his eyes still locked on Kyle. “What? Are you…” he couldn’t bring himself to finish the question, his chest too tight.

Kyle just nodded, rubbing Jason arm soothingly. “Yeah.”

Jason looked down to Lian, finding her staring up at him expectantly, her eyes shifting between him and Kyle. She knew, didn’t she? Had Kyle actually…

He unhooked their arms, holding out his hand, and for a moment he saw fear flash over Kyle’s face. “Come on,” Jason said with mock impatience, “this finger isn’t gonna put a ring on itself.”

Kyle gave his best fish impression, mouth opening and closing as no sound escaped, and Jason could only laugh at the look. Lian squished herself into his side, watching as intently as ever. Oh, Kyle definitely told her what he was going to do.

“So, you want to…” Kyle said with wonder as he stared as Jason’s outstretched hand. “You seriously, actually want, like now—”

“Yes.” Kyle made no sign of moving, and Jason waved his hand again. “Now come on, put the ring on, we haven’t got all night. Lian has to be in bed by ten you know.”

Nodding, Kyle reached back into Jason’s pocket, retrieving the little box he’d placed there. He took Jason’s hand, and in the next moment the band of metal slid onto his finger. He looked down to find a simple silver band, a small green jewel in the center.

“You like it?” Kyle asked hesitantly.

“I love it,” he whispered, watching as the lights caught on the ring’s surface. "I'll have to get you one, can't have you paying for everything, now can I?”

“Well,” Kyle trailed off, “I didn’t really pay for it? I got some help, but I made it back on Oa. It’s got a little bit of my ring’s energy in it, so you should be able to use it in a pinch, or so we can find each other.”

“Unfortunately I don’t have the ability to make something this beautiful and refined,” Jason grinned, “or from thin air, so you’ll just have to do deal with whatever nice and fancy ring I buy for you.”

“I think I can handle that.”

Lian’s tight hold on his jacket was the only thing keeping him from forgetting they weren’t alone. God, the things he wanted to do to Kyle now, all things he couldn’t do with his daughter around. How unfortunate.

Guess he’d have to wait for Aunt Donna to have another sleepover.

* * *

The first time Kyle took him to Oa had been interesting to say the least. He knew Green Lanterns would come in all shapes and sizes and consistencies, but knowing and seeing and  _ meeting _ were all very different things.

Kyle just laughed as he looked around wide eyed. They hadn’t even been on the planet for five minutes and they were already making a scene.

The introductions went by smoothly enough, the expected weariness slipping away into surprise when Kyle explained that they were engaged. Most understood what he meant, and Jason found himself being hugged or clapped on the shoulder more than a handful of times. There were a few that didn’t understand what it meant, didn’t see the point. Why not just wed immediately? What was the purpose of being engaged? Surely it is just a waste of time they could be spending with each other. Kyle and Jason tried to explain as best they could, somehow managing even just barely.

There was one group that didn’t need an explanation, and that was the Earth Lanterns. They all pulled him into a hug, congratulating him in their own way. They took him for drinks, all while retelling different stories and adventures. They accepted him so easily, it was honestly kind of weird. It’s not that he expected them to be hostile or anything, just not like this he supposed.

Not that he was complaining. 

Kyle took him around the planet, showing him damn near everything there was to see during the time they had. By the end of the little vacation Jason had been roped into promises of returning and bringing Lian with him. The Lanterns wanted a celebration once the wedding happened, just for them, and Jason was more than willing to oblige.

“I can’t believe this,” muttered Kyle, “I had to spend months proving myself to half these guys, but five minutes with you and they’re all in love.”

“Are you jealous?” Jason teased.

“Duh.”

“Aw, you don’t have to pout about it. No, wait, keep pouting, you’re  _ adorable _ when you pout.”

“You’re ridiculous.”

“And you love me for it.”

“Yeah.” Kyle moved closer, running his thumb over Jason’s lips. “I do, don’t I?”

* * *

They spent months planning the wedding, months preparing and organizing and bickering over what they wanted. All that time and by the end of it they knew it would be beautiful.

Apparently Lex Luthor and his precious Legion of Doom didn’t get the memo.

The wedding was broken up, the few civilians sent running as Lex bots rained down, and Jason about lost it. He’d tear Luthor and his cronies a new asshole for this.

He’d already decimated three of the robots by the time Kyle got to him, all bright and green. A fourth robot joined the wreckage before Kyle got him to calm down enough to listen. It had been years since he’d gotten into a fight like this, he was out of practice, he needed to get with the other civilians, keep them safe. But he hadn’t felt this kind of adrenaline and need to punch something in so long, hadn’t felt this fire burning through him so intensely. It had been almost five years if he remembered correctly, five years of staying away and not fighting, of keeping his hands clean, but when he grabbed another robot’s arm, twisted and slammed it into the ground, it felt like it was only yesterday.

A dozen robots later, his white suit was covered in grease and oil, and his knuckles were red, raw, and bloody. Kyle didn’t care, his eyes intense as they took him in. He didn’t care, couldn’t care, just pulled Jason into a closet, called him the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen, and dropped to his knees. A blowjob in a broom closet isn’t exactly what Jason had in mind for a wedding celebration, but who was he to deny Kyle in his time of desperation?

The venue was trashed, littered with broken furniture, tattered decorations, and bits and pieces of deactivated robots. It felt oddly fitting. Kyle just laughed, his face still flushed as they went to rejoin the others. They somehow managed to convince everyone to finish the wedding there, with everyone covered in dirt and oil, with the exhilaration from their battle running through their veins. They’d waited long enough, giving their vows in the ruins of an attack wouldn’t be the worst thing either of them had ever done.

If anything it just meant the wedding was more unique and exciting than everyone else’s. Suck on that Dick.

Jason somehow managed to find the bouquet he and Kyle had agreed to get. Sending Kyle and Lian a smirk he threw it right at Bruce’s face, hitting him head on. Despite Bruce’s glare he couldn’t stop himself from chuckling, especially not when Hal wiggled his eyebrows at Bruce suggestively.

Lian ran at him, all smiles and giggles and he caught her easily enough. Her laughter filled his ears, soon joined by Kyle’s as he rested his chin on Jason’s shoulder.

“Ready to go home Princess?” Jason asked.

“But the cake,” Lian protested, looking over to where it had once stood tall.

Kyle reached around him, brushing her hair back. “I’m sure we can figure something out.”

“But it was so pretty.”

“Sweetheart, Daddy married an artist, remember?” Jason said with mock seriousness. “Trust me, I thought this through.”

“But I can’t bake,” Kyle worried.

“No, but I can,” Jason answered. “So you can decorate. How’s that?”

Lian nodded vigorously, her hair falling even more out of the intricate ponytail Steph had put it in.

They all laughed, heading back to their hotel. Everyone else could figure out a reception, Jason and his little family had a cake to bake.

**Author's Note:**

> Good dad Jason is the shit and no one can convince me otherwise.  
> For anyone interested, I'm on tumblr [ do_not_careissa ](https://do-not-careissa.tumblr.com/)  
> 


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